Computer Criminals of Today As Imagined in 1980

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If you asked someone from 1980 what a computer criminal would look like today, this is the answer you would have got. The sad part is, I've looked at this picture for twenty minutes and I still can't tell which one is the criminal. :D Thanks to Izzy Reed for the image.
 
Cracked me up :D Love the Star Trek consoles too.

The text is pretty good entertainment as well.

"[Computers] will do away with cash, so that you need no longer fear being attacked for your money."

No, instead you will get stabbed in the face by someone claiming your expensive winter coat. Oh the peaceful future we live in. A young guy was killed for not handing over his hat to someone here recently. Anyway predictions are fun. I predict crime will rise everywhere until we eventually annihilate our selves.
 
"Many computers have secret codes to prevent anyone but their owners from operating them. As computers are used more and more, it is likely that computer crime will become increasingly difficult to carry out."
That is rich! I can't stop laughing. I could see the news headline: "Bank hacker stopped by pin number! More at 11!"

Also did everyone in the 80's wear tight pants?
Is that a zapper in the hand of the 'criminal'?
:D
 
Laugh at the picture all you want, but that text was actually a pretty decent prediction.
 
Laugh at the picture all you want, but that text was actually a pretty decent prediction.

Indeed, I read the text as well and found it to be reasonably accurate in a number of respects. The picture is pretty "far out" though :)
 
What are you guys talking about, you dont have helicopters?

and that little cassette the guy is running away with, can be replaced with the word storage device.

AKA thumb drive etc.

using their current terms to relate the future.

This was a pretty damn decent prediction.

The amusingly large computer covering the wall, since thats how large they were in the late 70's and early 80's for businesses. could be replaced with a wall sized screen.

the helicopter... replaced with a helicopter, since its a police helicopter not a personal heli, though why it has floats i have no idea, the Sea Crime Police computer division probably.

The zapper gun, replaced with a taser....

yea... I sorta like it.
 
That is rich! I can't stop laughing. I could see the news headline: "Bank hacker stopped by pin number! More at 11!"

Also did everyone in the 80's wear tight pants?
Is that a zapper in the hand of the 'criminal'?
:D

No they didn't. Some did, but not everyone. Also the criminal is the one with the "cassette" tape and the cop is the dork with the helmet and ray gun. But actually the articles prediction is fairly accurate aside from the statement that computer crime would be increasingly difficult to carry out. And actually depending on your perspective, it is an accurate statement. What the article fails to account for is that the average persons knowledge of computer operation is 10x what it was 30 years ago if not greater. (As sad as that is.) The systems of today are far more sophisticated than the author and illustrator of that article could have known, but at the same time with the public's knowledge of computers being so much greater than the average people of 1980, such safeguards aren't nearly as effective as one might have thought back then. Additionally computer networks weren't as far reaching as they are today. With global access to nearly anything, criminals have a much easier time targeting systems and getting what they want from them.
 
Welp, I was just starting to leave a message for a customer about their computer that is in my office just as I clicked on this picture.
My customer now has a voice mail from me with me laughing then telling them how their system needs a new motherboard, I do not think they are going to take my message seriously now.

Oh well, guess I will have to explain to them how a computer thief from the 80's stealing a tape from a mainframe guarded by some guy wearing black leathers and wearing a helmet made me go into hysteria.
 
You shouldn't plant trees like that so close to your house/foundation. Water problems will occur, even in the future.
 
Killer boots man!
icon14.gif
 
You shouldn't plant trees like that so close to your house/foundation. Water problems will occur, even in the future.

Hahah, phone boy just realized he hadn't watered his plant either. The police are on the case but his ficus will never forgive him.
 
I am still LOL'ing at the fact that they predicted skinny jeans... hahahaha
 
BWAHAHAHAHA!

I love it, all of it, especially Steve's stolen helmet. That helmet rocks the house.
 
I've worked it out.

The guy running away with the device in his hand has committed copyright theft which in the digital future is punishable without trial or a jury of your peers by death which is being administered by the private security of the record and film industry under license.

The guy in the background is simply hacking the other guys Wi-Fi via his smart phone to download child porn and operate his spam posting botnet, none of which are as serious a crime as copyright infringement and as such he is free to go about his business.
 
I've worked it out.

The guy running away with the device in his hand has committed copyright theft which in the digital future is punishable without trial or a jury of your peers by death which is being administered by the private security of the record and film industry under license.

The guy in the background is simply hacking the other guys Wi-Fi via his smart phone to download child porn and operate his spam posting botnet, none of which are as serious a crime as copyright infringement and as such he is free to go about his business.

I laughed pretty hard at that, and then got sad when I realized there is truth in it.
 
Love how they say money is downloaded to the thief's computer..

Then say, would another thief steal his computer to get all the monies?
 
What are you guys talking about, you dont have helicopters?

and that little cassette the guy is running away with, can be replaced with the word storage device.

AKA thumb drive etc.

using their current terms to relate the future.

This was a pretty damn decent prediction.

The amusingly large computer covering the wall, since thats how large they were in the late 70's and early 80's for businesses. could be replaced with a wall sized screen.

the helicopter... replaced with a helicopter, since its a police helicopter not a personal heli, though why it has floats i have no idea, the Sea Crime Police computer division probably.

The zapper gun, replaced with a taser....

yea... I sorta like it.

The text on the left is pretty accurate. Remember, this was the early 80's. The notion of a "password", let alone encryption, was pretty high tech for the average joe type of person. That's why they used the term "secret codes" instead.

It's only at the last couple of sentences, and of course, the picture, that it starts falling apart. Why would a hacker store details of his crimes on a cassette (thumb drive)? The "detectives" would check log files and look up IP-addresses, not come crashing into people's homes with weapons drawn. The whole thing reminds me of the RIAA anti-piracy parody from several years ago.
 
Yaho Lord Helmet! May the schwarz be with you! Kind of reminds me of the costumes that they used in spaceballs.
 
Being one of the kids who read Popular Science in the 70s this looks pretty fimilar. You will notice that much of it is influenced by the pop culture of the times. It seems that era was obsessed with future events.
someone post a link to that Bill Shatner AT&T microprocessor vid. The computer criminal picture looks like a page from it.
 
That is rich! I can't stop laughing. I could see the news headline: "Bank hacker stopped by pin number! More at 11!"

Also did everyone in the 80's wear tight pants?
Is that a zapper in the hand of the 'criminal'?
:D
The 80s also had the amazingly baggy "parachute pants" as worn by MC Hammer.
 
Great predictions, but the illustrations look like a PsD in a few ways.

The MacGuyver-esque dude looks like he's been twisted about his own pelvis by his orange 'Hammer pants, and his right arm run over by the S.W.A.T. van.

Then there's The Fonz, with...Lord only knows what's on his head. I can't stop laughing whenever I look at it, though. And it appears he has an early-1800s pistol in his hand, with a ridiculously-long sighting device mounted to its top.

That all said, it's a well-done illustration (I concede), with some obvious 80s twists.
 
Oh is that some kind of electronic device? I thought he was stealing someone's sweet Magic: The Gathering deck....
 
Sure it predicts computer crime, but it also predicts that we have no muggings, car thefts or burglaries. Too bad it was wrong about that.

Also the theif looks like a minion of one of James Bond's adversaries. He should have an SMG and shot at Bond while protecting Zorn Industries or something.
 
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